Walking in Favor & Grace

LwLOGO

Tonight's Living Waters lesson is called Healthy Same-sex Friendships.  As I was reviewing the lesson during my prayer time for the group leaders, teachers and participants I was reminded of how much God has changed my life in the past few years. 

During the years I hid my sexual addictions, my male friends were few and the relationships strained.  It was no one's fault but mine.  To me, men were foreign creatures that I craved.  I just couldn't understand how I was supposed to fit in with men socially.  So, if I was required to be in a group of men, I was usually on the edge or the back row, quietly watching and longing to belong.  If my participation was required, I generally overcompensated and became the clown of the party - Mr. Entertainment. 

I came to realize that all men deal with similar issues; we just respond to our issues in different ways.  The issue wasn't that I didn't belong to the CLUB OF MEN, it was more that I wouldn't be vulnerable enough to fit myself in.  I kept expecting an invitation.  Would someone please make me participate?  Would someone please call me a man?

It's funny how it finally happened.  It was in a small group of guys similar to our Living Waters groups.  These men were as messed up as I was and dealt with their own issues.  Finally, much like a misfit toy, I found a place to belong which gave me hope that I could become the mature man God called me to be.

I grew up emotionally in that environment - that place of belonging.   From 14 to 40 in a few months.  No longer did I see myself as a kid trying to fit into a man's world, I knew I am truly a man - and a man of God! 

Now, looking back, I think of men that God placed in my life through the years to challenge and encourage me.  I doubt that they knew the impact they had during the years we were friends.  I am thankful for Joe, Wayne, Rocky, Phil, Kevin, Mark, Todd, Gaylon, Steven, and Tim.  They loved and accepted me without requiring anything in return during the years that I had little to offer. 

Now I feel that I am surrounded by men like this, and this time I don't feel worthless.  I have something to offer to the relationship and hopefully am able to express my gratitude frequently.  I won't list them here because they know who they are (and I don't want to embarrass them!)  But I will say that in addition to these wonderful relationships, I also have some GREAT men in my family that I am so proud of!  My daddy is the most godly man I have ever known.  I am so proud of my son, Jonathan and my sons-in-law Chris and Jeff and my grandsons Chandler, Izaak, Braeden, Landon and Gavin.  They all make me a better man by their influence in my life. 

And that doesn't even take into consideration my wonderful wife and the other women in my life...  That's next week's lesson!

It's been a beautiful week here in the Upstate as you can tell by this view from my office window.  It got very cool for the past couple of nights.  Hopefully, that took care of some of the pollen!  But we're in the 70's during the day. 

Spring in South Carolina

Yippee!!  I'm so thankful to live in a mild climate.

I am reminded that Paul said that he had learned to be content in whatever state he found himself.  We've experienced that too.  We were content in the state of Ohio (spring floods), Missouri (tornadoes), Alabama (wiregrass), and Indiana (10-day ice storms).  Now, for the past 13 years we've been content in South Carolina with our azaleas, dogwoods and magnolias a couple of hours from the beach and an hour from the mountains. 

We live in a beautiful country!  Be content in the state you find yourself today.

Mid-Atlantic Regional Exodus Conference 2004

So, after 13 weeks of no work (I was laid off from my job on January 13), I have my first, real-live, face-to-face interview tonight.  Ever since I lost my job, I have said and believed that God was going to use this as an opportunity to move me back into full-time ministry. 

I have not been in full-time ministry since 1995 when we moved from Kokomo, Indiana to Greenville, South Carolina.  I have considered many options and was offered different opportunities, but nothing ever worked out.  Last week, I found several job openings for which I qualified and the pay was right.  Before leaving for the regional conference, I sent in several resumes for these non-ministry jobs.  I had again put ministry on the back burner.  One of the last messages I received last week was from a friend who said, "I'll be praying that you find a place in ministry."  When I read it I thought, "Oh yeah, I'm supposed to be going into ministry, not looking for an office job!"

The next day, I left for Virginia, and before the day was over I had received an offer to join a ministry staff.  Tonight, I meet with the ministry board.  I  believe tonight is the night that our prayers are answered.  Actually, I believe God answered the prayers before we ever prayed them, but tonight is the night I get to celebrate!  Hallelujah!!  Party with me.

Last night, we returned from the Exodus Mid-Atlantic Regional Conference in Williamburg, Virginia.  The setting of the Woodlands Conference Center is beautiful and their staff members were all very gracious.  We had a great weekend of workshops, worship, prayer and fellowship.  There was a light rain most of the weekend, but it didn't dampen our spirits.  This picture is the view from the room where our general sessions were held.  It was so peaceful.  During our communion service on Sunday morning, several people stood by these windows as they participated.  While some stayed at their seats, others knelt by a candle-lit altar area and some gathered around a cross contemplating the work of grace that has freed us from our sins.  It was a GREAT weekend.  If you get a chance to attend an Exodus conference, DO IT!!  You can usually find one near you at www.exodus.to.

Scenic

After attending the Exodus Leadership Conference last week, I have been challenged to examine my words, my philosophy and my attitude.  (Dear Lord, do we have to go there AGAIN?)  Actually, it's not just a result of the conference, but the conference confirmed some things that I had been hearing from several sources - including my church, my devotions and personal study times, and from other ministries.

Alan Chambers & Randy Thomas

Some questions that we in ministry are facing are these: Are we equipped to reach the generation and culture in which God has planted us?  Does the world see that we and our message are relevant?  Is it possible to change our methods and maintain the integrity of our message? 

I was challenged far past just trying to change the way we "do church" or the way we present our ministries through support groups or lectures or whatever means have been effective up to this point.  I was personally challenged to look at my own life and the way I present myself, the way I present Jesus and His truth, and the way I present the message of freedom.

Thanks to the speakers I heard last week, I want more than ever to be relevant to those who are missing from the church.  I want to be effective in reaching them with the message of redemption.  I want to be honest and full of integrity in my words, my presentation and my personality.

Don't get your hopes up.  I probably won't have earrings or tattoos next time you see me, but hopefully I will demonstrate the person of Jesus through the power of the Holy Spirit as if He were here in the flesh.  May we all behold His glory - full of grace and truth.

Each year a few hundred people fill our church parking lot for an afternoon of fun, games

Testing the Slide

 and prizes.  Today was no exception.  Local stores were generous with the prizes so that we were able to give away three bicycles, two scooters, and loads of other fun stuff. 

The rides were bigger and badder than last year.  This was our third year to offer this gift to our community.  Pastor Jerry and Chris Whitman do a great job of leading this ministry.  WE LOVE OUR CITY!

Lots of new beginnings are happening right now.  The fall Cleansing

Joy in the midst of chaos

Stream sessions have just started, a new men's support group will be starting next month, my role with Exodus may be changing soon, our church prayer team is being reorganized, Kid's Quest is two weeks away, and our church leadership breakaway is at the end of the  month.  That's just the ministry changes.  Besides that, I have a new position at work and our ninth grandchild is due two months from today.

One of my great consolations is knowing that all of this is part of God's plan for my life.  I am full of joy and have great expectations that the end result of all these changes will be that I will know HIM better and will live more closely to HIM.

From Psalm 94 in The Message: 

 If God hadn't been there for me,
      I never would have made it.
   The minute I said, "I'm slipping, I'm falling,"
      your love, God, took hold and held me fast.
   When I was upset and beside myself,
      you calmed me down and cheered me up.